Can tarot cards ruin your life?
Can tarot cards ruin your life? Sure, there are ways you can use and abuse tarot, just as you can with any tool. You could utilize a chainsaw to take down some trees or to commit mass murder but that doesn’t make the chainsaws the problem. So let’s explore some ways one can use tarot inappropriately and then how one can use it for love, light and a little bit of magic.
Photo by averie woodard on Unsplash
ways to use tarot that are a terrible plan:
YOU ARE USING TAROT TO MAKE ALL YOUR DECISIONS
Girl, you already know this is a bad idea. It’s like relying on a magic 8 ball for financial planning purposes or to solve mental health issues. I use tarot as one tool in my toolbelt, not the only option. If you pull a spread about a huge life decision, maybe you might want to run it past some folks too. Maybe you might want to do some research. Maybe you might want to sleep on it. Whatever. Just don’t come to me telling me that the only thing you ever use is tarot.
YOU want the TAROT CARDS TO COnDONE YOUR BAD BEHAVIOUR
A few years back, inappropriately drawn to a married man, I pulled cards every five minutes looking for the Universe to condone my poor behavior. If I’d asked my friends for advice they would have reflected the truth back to me a lot quicker. Instead of wondering “Can tarot cards ruin your life?” I should have asked “Am I ruining my own life with my complete denial?” A classic way to know when you are doing this is when you pull the same spread over and over again - you want an answer that you’re not getting on some major life issue. Notice this and then reconsider your strategy. Tarot is not the answer here. Some therapy or a cold shower might be a better plan.
You’re obsessed with your deck
If you can’t seem to put the deck down, this is a red flag. Again, take a deep breath, notice you’re doing it and ask yourself what you’re avoiding. Chances are you know the answer if you pause long enough. Maybe you are too isolated and you need to get out more. Maybe you are engaging in addictive behaviours and using tarot as a crutch. Maybe you’re depressed and need to seek help. Tarot is not a therapist, a 12 Step programme or a panacea. It is great thing when used as one part of a big life. Don’t let it take over. Again, if you’re wondering “Can tarot cards ruin my life?” you might want to point the finger at some of your unhealthy beahviours in your life instead. Tarot isn’t the problem here.
You are using tarot as a replacement for friends
Speaking of what tarot is not, tarot is not a substitute for a good bunch of buddies. Everyone needs a tribe, even if you think you’re a lone wolf. Especially if you think you’re a lone wolf. When I was 30ish (and going through my Saturn Return) I began to realize just how isolated and alone I was. I didn’t need tarot, I needed humans that I could trust to remind me when I was out of line and to love me no matter what. Everyone needs this, everyone deserves this and tarot is not a fucking substitute, no matter how good you are with the cards. If you suck at making friends, it’s okay, so was I for a long time. Ask the Universe to help you to find your tribe; you’re not everyone’s cup of tea and that’s totally okay.
You are misinterpreting the cards
Can tarot ruin your life? Not really. But you can ruin tarot with your shitty, old school interpretation of what it’s for. It’s time to start updating your approach to tarot, to start using the cards in the way they were intended. Not to tell you what to do with your life, not as a crutch for your shitty decisions, not as a way to reinforce your dogma, but as a way to challenge you to grow, to become a bigger and better person. The way I use tarot isn’t as an oracle or a replacement for research, it’s as a tools that helps you to feel your feels, challenge yourself to think new thoughts and find a way back to your own wisdom and intuition. Read on to find out what that looks like.
You’re trying to use tarot cards to predict the future
I’m going to predict the future: tarot cards can ruin your life if you try to use it to predict the future. For example: you pulled the Death card and now you’re convinced someone is going to die and so you ruin your own life with worry. Or you pulled the Devil card and start obsessing about dark spirits in a way that ruins your life and that of everyone around you. The cards ruin your life or your brain does?
Let’s be clear, tarot cannot predict the future. If it could, all tarot readers would win the lottery. It can’t even tell you exactly what to do with your life and what decisions to make. What it can do is help you to see what is blocking you from making your own wise decisions and then offer you suggestions on how to clear those blocks.
You think tarot readers are more powerful/intuitive/connected than you are
Getting a tarot card reading is like getting a sponsor in Alcoholics Anonymous. That person is just another bozo on the bus but they can see your problems clearer than you can because they have space around your problems in a way that you don’t. They aren’t special so don’t put them on a pedestal. I read tarot really well for other people but I sometimes struggle to read it for myself, because my ego gets in the way. I’m just a person like you. I just happen to be able to do this but I’m not more connected to anything magical than you are.
Ways to use tarot that make sense
using tarot to help you to trust your intution
When I was telling myself that I should know all the answers, tarot showed me that working with the big questions - not knowing all the time - was what wise women did. This state of mind is really what intuition is. It reminded me that clarity comes in flashes and the rest of life is an opportunity to try out what I had been shown during those ah-ha moments and meaningful coincidences. I wished for more certainty but tarot held my hand and reminded me to breathe. It became my doula.
tarot can give you a little steady ground to stand on
It might seem counter-intuitive but as I became more willing to embrace uncertainty the connection to my own center and my own steadfastness got stronger. I was more grounded, I could ride the waves of real life with more faith and - when all else failed - I could be humble enough to reach out to others for help. It turns out that it wasn’t certainty that I needed, it was the resilience, faith and emotional maturity to live with the natural uncertainty that life presents us with. Try pulling one card from the Major Arcana each month to ground you into the month ahead and then one card from the minors each day to give you a daily shot of wisdom. Pulling a card on a daily basis from different tarot decks can give you not only more confidence that tarot is a tool you can rely on for building your own intuition and inner wisdom but also shows you the intrinsic power of each card.
TAROT CHEERS YOU ON NO MATTER WHAT
Being human is messy and beautiful, and we all need guides and mentors along the way. As your Tarot Doula, I create space for you to connect to your own wisdom - to the parts of you that you’ve been too scared to listen to or the thing that’s just at the edge of your awareness. Often we just need to be reminded that we’re on the right track, or that we need more patience, other times we need specific clues that will lead to that big ah-ha moment when we get a flood of clarity and inspiration.
Even when the cards offer us specific advice it is always our choice whether we follow them or not. At the end of readings my clients tell me they can breathe a little easier, connect a little deeper and access their own truths with less fear. This is the purpose of Tarot Doula - not to tell you the future or to claim that I know more than you. The answers are within you, me and my cards are just here to help.
Can tarot ruin your life? Only if you let it, silly.
If you are going through a huge shift in your life and want powerful support, I have created a resource for you. Click here to read more about how you can use tarot can support you in a groundbreaking way, with my free tarot card cheat sheet.
You can also book a reading below if you want some help today.
Love,
Laura
p.s. scroll down for frequently asked questions
Frequently asked questions
Q: When should you not use tarot cards?
A: When you’re drunk, high, looking for only one answer, when you’ve pulled the same spread ten million times and when you already know it’s a bad plan before you even start. It’s also important not to use tarot cards to make life and death decisions without consulting a doctor, to use them to make financial decisions without also consulting someone who knows about financial stuff or to make any major life decision without also running it past some humans who are wise and kind and could pull an intervention on you if they needed to. “Put the cards down and back away slowly”.
Q: Is it good to read tarot cards?
A: It’s not good or bad. It just is. I know some people think that if you love Jesus then you can’t pull tarot and I’m not going to comment on that because everyone is entitled to their own opinion. But as far as I can see, nobody ever got hurt by tarot, they only got hurt by someone who was mentally ill or using tarot to justify behaviour that they knew wasn’t good to start with. Tarot isn’t magical, it doesn’t have any special powers and it can’t hurt you. It’s just a tool that you can use to connect with your own intuition and inner wisdom. That’s it.
Q: Is it okay to do tarot everyday?
A: You are a grown ass adult and you can use tarot however you like, including using tarot on a daily basis. Again, tarot can’t hurt anyone so if you want to pull some cards every day then go ahead. If you ask something like: What do I need to know today? How can I be the best version of myself today? What do my guides want to tell me today? or What would help me to spread joy to others today? then you’re using tarot to make your life and the lives of everyone around you better. Check your state of mind before you use it and remember that tarot is a tool, not a weapon. Use it wisely and kindly and responsibly, it has no intrinsic power of its own, it’s going to act in the manner you use it.
Q: Is it okay to read tarot for yourself?
A: Like I said above, I find it a little tricky to read tarot for myself because I want a particular answer or my ego gets in the way or I second guess myself, or whatever. That said, I still throw cards for myself at least once a month, just to ground my energy for the month ahead and to give myself something to aim for. Often it makes a lot more sense once I go back and look back at the month once I know what happened and in that way I can actually use it as a tool to gain insight into the cards in ways that maybe I didn’t see before. I love how tarot is a tool that keeps on giving and that I will never know everything there is to know, no matter how many tarot decks I have, people I read for or whatever. I try to stay humble and when I need to, I get someone else to read for me.
Q: Can tarot cards ruin relationships?
A: Occasionally I hear someone say “tarot ruined my relationship”. To which I say (with love): No it didn’t. You ruined your relationship by thinking that tarot was going to fix it or fix them or change them or whatever it was that you were using it for that it’s not meant to do. Again - how many times can I say this - tarot is a tool. Use it wisely. If your relationship is in trouble maybe you could seek some marriage counseling or group therapy or something that offers you both a chance to improve how you communicate. Tarot is not here to ruin your life or your relationships. When used wisely and appropriately it can offer you insight into the person you need to become either to evolve your way out of the relationship or evolve your way into being a much better partner and thus saving your relationship.
Q: Can tarot cards predict love?
A: Damn I wish it could. But no, not really. But don’t despair, what tarot can do is to show you every single thing that is blocking you from finding that love and then offer you suggestions on how to blow through those blocks. And isn’t that much more useful? Because you might know that love is coming next month and to look out for a tall guy with blonde hair, but if you then meet him and you’re still carrying all that fear or anxiety, if you still haven’t gotten over your ex or grieved that miscarriage or worked through your resentments at your mother, then it doesn’t matter if you know he’s coming next month. Coz you gonna be a hot mess when he shows up girl. You didn’t want to hear that but you know I’m speaking truth.
Q: Why am I drawn to tarot cards?
A: Because you are having a spiritual awakening, my dear. You see meaningful coincidences, signs and synchronicities everywhere you go, you have started to realise that life is more than can be seen, you believe that a loving force is guiding the Universe and you want a way to tap into that. Enter tarot. The cards offer you a way to get to know the part of yourself that isn’t just about making lists and hustling and getting sh*t done. You know that you need guidance from something that is smarter than your prefrontal cortex. You want to know more truth than school ever offered you. Enter tarot. You have started to get that a massive shift is occurring on the planet. You want to be a part of it. You want to find your purpose and help others to find theirs. Enter tarot. It’s such an amazing tool and it’s free, easy to access and always there when you need it. Oh, and you can fit it in your purse. Perfect.
Q: Are tarot cards supernatural?
A: I’m not even really sure what that means. I know that tarot is something I don’t totally understand with my left (rational) brain. I know that they seem to offer the perfect answer, even when I’m not exactly sure what I’m asking. I know that sometimes the right card literally jumps out of the deck across the room and lands on the floor at my feet in a READ-ME-NOW kinda way. If that makes them supernatural, then I guess they are. But don’t quote me on that.
Q: Can tarot cards cause anxiety?
A: Sometimes I hear about tarot cards causing anxiety in someone. If this is the case, I suggest that you put the tarot deck down and gently step away. Then I suggest that you seek therapy, an addiction recovery program, a doctor, or whatever help you need before coming back to your cards. Tarot is useful if you are in a good state of mind but not helpful when you are desperately trying to fix your life or work out a really difficult problem on your own. You need a whole tool belt of tools and a really solid tribe of other humans to help you to live a whole, healthy life and tarot can only be a tiny part of that. So be good to yourself and only use tarot when it’s contributing to your life in a healthy way.